Same As You
by nrfame
Summary: When you love someone, what should you do? Should you let them know? Should you keep it a secret? What if you loved two people and you’ve never done this type of thing? What do you do? Meredith and Derek. AU
1. Chapter 1

**When you love someone, what should you do? Should you let them know? Should you keep it a secret? What if you loved two people and you've never done this type of thing? What do you do? Meredith and Derek or Meredith and Mark – not really sure who I want to be together yet. Mostly AU.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. This story is for my enjoyment and hopefully the enjoyment of my readers. I love writing and I love Grey's Anatomy. So when I can conjoin the two everything is great.**

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Meredith Grey was the top in her field of work. Couples came to her all the time trying to figure out how to fix their relationship, if it was salvageable. Most of the time, her clients found out that the problems between them were easily fixable. Then they went home as a happy couple and sent her Christmas cards every year. It never failed.

However, right now looking at the couple before her she wasn't so sure that they would be one of the couples that would find out that they really loved each other. Her patients were Addison Montgomery and Derek Shepherd. Addison Montgomery was a beautiful woman; there was no doubt about that. However, there was something about her. Addison gave off the vibe that she was scared to lose her husband but she loved someone else. Addison's husband on the other hand gave off the vibe that he didn't want to be here, and he could never forgive the woman beside him. After seven years in the business Meredith could pick up this kind of stuff.

Meredith looked at the information on her clipboard as she sat back in her chair. Usually she waited for one of her patients to start speaking about what was going on in the relationship, but it had been ten minutes and no one had said anything.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Meredith Grey. We have about forty more minutes until your session is up. So I think one of you should start." Meredith tried to smile at both of her clients, but Addison looked nervous and Derek looked like he was pissed and didn't want to be there, at all.

Addison looked over to her husband and smiled weakly. He looked at her and his facial expression didn't change. She knew that they probably weren't going to be able to save their relationship, but she still hoped. Maybe a part of Derek wanted to save their relationship, but Addison knew what he really wanted. He really wanted out of the relationship. He didn't want to look at her. He would never forgive her, but she still hoped.

"Hi. Dr. Grey. Um…where should we start? We are new at this. I mean…we've never tried this before and my friend Naomi said that you were the best. So we came to you because we…I mean I messed up. I cheated on Derek. Which was a mistake, but I still want to save this relationship." Addison wasn't this type of woman she never rambled. She was very sure of herself. She was gorgeous and she had what she wanted in life, but right now. She was scared as hell, so…she rambled.

Meredith smiled at Addison, at least Addison was trying. She admitted her faults. She looked at Derek and smiled at him. "Derek…what about you?" She said in a soft voice.

Derek looked up at her, and his blue eyes met her green. She was gorgeous to say the least. Her hair was tied back away from her face, her skin was a beautiful semi-tan color and her body looked so soft. He wondered what his hands would feel like running across her body. He shook her head. He could not be thinking like this. He probably just wanted to get revenge on Addison. He could not be thinking things about his marriage counselor.

"You heard her. She cheated. I didn't do anything wrong." He said, gruffly. Derek knew that he probably had some fault in this, but he also knew that if Addison had ever did something he wouldn't cheat on her. He couldn't. He was raised to not do that sort of thing. He was raised to love one woman with all of his heart. He had a father, mother and four sisters – and unlike most other males he believed in forevers.

Meredith wasn't surprised to hear that Derek believed that he didn't do anything wrong. However, when she looked into his bright blue eyes she could tell what he was really thinking. She could tell that he felt at fault for this, but he wasn't going to admit it. Derek's eyes were very expressive and for Meredith she could reach the depths of his soul looking through his eyes, no matter how cliché that really was.

"Okay then." Meredith said clearing her throat. She couldn't be thinking about her clients eyes and how she wanted to get lost in them for days. No. She was trying to save a relationship, not make one for herself. And that was Meredith's secret.

She looked between the two of them again, trying not to look back into Derek's eyes no matter how tempting the idea was. She waited again for one of them to say something. Usually in this type of situation after one said something, the other said something quickly in return to counter what the other had said. But it seemed that Derek and Addison were not going to be her typical couple. She sat back in her chair – writing down a note that this couple was not like the norm.

She waited another few minutes as she watched Addison twiddle her fingers and Derek looked at her and then out the window. She leaned forward and then said in a serious tone. "I'm sorry but you guys really need to talk or I can't help you. Maybe you don't want help, so you shouldn't be here. However, you are here – so I think you want help. So you need to let me know what is going on. This isn't going to work if you don't talk. A relationship is built on communication. And that is what we are here to fix, your relationship" Meredith heard Derek huff, but he didn't say anything. She waited for someone to say something, anything. She needed them to speak or she would bail on them at least for a few minutes. She couldn't stand the silence.

Addison really wanted to say something but she didn't know what to say. _I made love to my husband's best friend over and over for two months until he found us in bed. Now I'm here because I'm scared to lose my husband. _Addison couldn't say that. Although it was the truth, she still couldn't say it. Addison didn't believe that Derek did something wrong, he was a great husband. He was always there for her – through the good, the bad, and the ugly. However, he wasn't the love of her life. His best friend was.

Both Addison and her husband watched their counselor stand up and walk out of the room, with a very annoyed look on her face.

Meredith walked out of her office and walked down the hallway, trying to get away from the couple that wouldn't talk. Meredith knew that it was the wrong thing to do, but she couldn't help it. She was dreaming about looking into Derek's eyes as he looked between her and the window. Addison wasn't saying anything. They were there and not doing anything. Meredith didn't like not knowing what to do. Meredith reached into her suit pocket for her cell phone. She quickly pressed the number two and then the call button. She needed to talk to her best friend right now. He usually knew what to do, even if he didn't know what it was like to be in that office.

She waited three rings, when she heard his gruff voice on the other end of the phone. She smiled.

"What?" He said, and Meredith could tell that she woke him up.

"Well good morning sleepy head." She laughed softly…remembering the time, but she didn't mind that. She always called him, waking him up.

"Mer…why the hell are you calling me at eight in the morning?" Mark said, running his hand over his stubble.

"Because I have two clients that aren't talking and I need your help." She waited for him to respond. "I know you aren't a counselor. I know that I have the degree for this, but I need your help." She begged in a voice that she knew always got him.

Mark rolled his eyes. "Fine…how can I help you with YOUR job?" He said leaning against the back of his bed, while he let a laugh leave his lips.

"What do I do? The wife cheated on the husband, and I think the guy she cheated on him with was a very important man to the husband. And they aren't talking. How can I make them talk?" She said, sitting down on a chair as she looked down the hallway watching as the door next to her office opened. At first she was pretty sure that it was her door, but then she noticed her colleague walk out the door. She smiled at him as he smiled at her.

Mark's eyes went wide. This couldn't be the two people in his life that mattered to him, other than Meredith that she was talking about. No…Derek and Addison couldn't be Meredith's patients because then Meredith would find out what he did and then she would most likely not talk to him again. So Mark was going to be optimistic and it was some other couple with something similar to what he was currently in. Plus…Meredith was guessing…she really didn't know if this was the story or not.

"What you should do is just talk. Talk about your life. Talk about your things. Hell, talk about me. Make your patients feel welcome and all that. I bet your patients would start talking after they learned about me. I'm a very important man…" Mark heard Meredith scoff as he was talking and then he continued. "and they would talk after they heard about me." He smirked although she couldn't see it. He knew that she knew that he was smirking. If Derek and Addison were the couple and they heard Meredith talk about him, they would certainly start talking.

"Oh yes…my patients will be all talk after I tell them about my egotistical best friend." She ran her hand over her skirt, smoothing it out. Just like her mind set was smoothing out as she talked about him and just laughed. Mark was always able to make her smile and he helped her when she needed it.

"Then why did you call me?"

"I don't know." She said in the same tone as he gave her, sarcastic.

"Okay since you don't know...I'm going back to sleep." He said, waiting for her to hang up first.

"Fine…I'll see you tonight right?" She asked. It was Friday and they usually went out together. It was their time to just relax and forget about work and just be best friends. It was their time to be together.

"Yes Mer…I promise I will be there."

"Oh and don't go off with any girls this time. I don't want to be alone." She laughed softly.

Mark rolled his eyes. "Fine." He said in a rough tone, but it was playful at the same time.

"Okay thank you. See you tonight Markie-poo." She teased him, using the name that Mark absolutely hated, especially when she used it in public. The thought just made her laugh.

"Bye Meri-Berry." He repeated the name that she didn't like.

Meredith hung up the phone and placed it in her lap and then back down the hallway. She took a deep breath as she stood up. She could do this. She was the best marriage counselor in New York City. Couples came to her all the time, needing her help. Addison and Derek weren't any different. She just needed to go back in there and do her job. She walked over to the door and looked inside. Meredith was surprised to see both Addison and Derek both sitting in their seats. She must have not been gone that long.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to leave. Well that's a lie. I did mean to leave. I just needed a breath of fresh air. The no talking thing is a new thing to me." She laughed as she walked over to her seat and sat down. She looked at her watch, wanting the time.

"Okay…so we have a few more minutes left – and I know that we really haven't spoken that much. So…if you want to talk. Talk…if you don't. I will. I will tell you everything about me. And I'm sure you don't want to hear all of it, but talking is important in this job. So…" She drug her last word out hoping that someone would say something. However, two pairs of eyes looked back at her like they wanted her to talk. But she still waited; Meredith would wait a few minutes. And that's what she did…she waited a few more minutes in silence, then looked back down at her watch. "Well it seems that we don't have that much time to talk about me today…so if you want another appointment – make one with my secretary. I'm sorry that I wasn't that much help. I am better at this…I just hope that you will make another appointment so we can work on your marriage. You two look like you want to work this out…but we need to talk. So, if you want to talk again make an appointment. If you don't, well you still have my cell number so you can call me for anything. Have a good day." Meredith knew that she lied when she told them that they looked like they wanted to work on their relationship, but she was determined to be optimistic, someone had to be in this room. Meredith walked over to the door and smiled at both of them as they grabbed their stuff and Addison made a quick dash out the door.

Meredith took a deep breath as she waited for Derek to walk out the door. He stood up off the chair and walked over to her. The whole time that they were in the room he felt like he could talk to Meredith, however he couldn't talk in front of his wife. He couldn't do anything in front of his wife. He really didn't want to be around her more than he had to be. Meredith was about to hold her hand out to Derek while he stood in front of her.

"I'm sorry Dr. Grey…I just can't talk in front of her. If you knew exactly what she did…you would understand. I can't talk in front of her. I can't look at her without being disgusted." He said honestly as he stood in front of her, looking deeply in her dark green eyes. Her eyes were a new color to him and while he looked at her he fell in love with the color of her eyes. A part of him was telling him that he just wanted to get with Dr. Grey to get revenge on Addison, but Derek really knew it wasn't like that. He wasn't in love with her, but he liked being around her.

"Okay…well you want to just talk one on one?" She asked him while she smiled at him softly. She understood what he meant…okay so maybe she didn't know exactly but she knew from all of her other patients what he meant.

"Yes…that would be great." He admitted.

"Okay you can make an appointment with Maggie and we can talk. However, if you need to talk any other time besides appointments you can call my cell. I'm always available for you." She smiled at him as she held her hand out to him. Derek placed his hand around hers and smiled. There was a connection there.

"What about now? I'm free now. Can we talk now?" Derek shook his head so softly that it wasn't that noticeable. Meredith looked out of her door and noticed one of her most loyal patients walk into the office. She reluctantly looked back at Derek with a sad smile.

"I'm sorry. I'm not available now but I'm available in about two hours."

Derek couldn't believe that he was upset that she couldn't help him now, but she was a very popular counselor so he understood. "Okay…I might come back next week." He stepped away from her and then grabbed his coat off of his arm. "Thank you Dr. Grey for everything you attempted today. I'm sorry Addison and I aren't very good clients." He laughed sourly.

"You can call me Meredith." Derek calling her Dr. Grey sounded a little weird to her. "And you weren't that bad. I've had worse." She laughed softly.

"Okay thank you Meredith" he liked the way her name felt rolling off his tongue, but he wasn't going to say anything about it "and you know you don't have to lie to me."

"I'm not."

"Okay." He smiled not wanting to leave her presence just yet.

"Okay." She said as softly as he did.

"Have a good day Meredith." He said walking out her door, taking one last look at her.

"You too Derek." She watched him leave, and then turned back to her office. She couldn't feel anything for a patient…that was just crazy. And she wasn't even sure if she felt something for Derek. He was just nice, maybe she felt bad for him. He looked like he had been through a lot in his life; maybe they had that in common. There was just a friendly bond there…that's all that was allowed in her job. Although, she wanted to see him again - maybe she just wanted to help him, because that's what she did. She helped people. She didn't like patients in that way.

_Okay…so this was my first chapter. I hope you liked it. I have a basic idea about where I'm going…I have ideas for about ten? more chapters. Please read and review. Constructive criticism is always welcome._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Disclaimer: I still don't own Grey's Anatomy. Although, the idea amazes me.

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Meredith was surprised how short her meeting with Matthew was. Usually when Matthew came into see her they usually talked for a few hours about what was going on his life and life's small surprises. Meredith was a marriage counselor – however, Matthew was one of her best patients. They had met through a few marriage counseling sessions. His wife and him were doing fine in their relationship now, but he still wanted to have a few meetings to make sure that he was doing okay so they wouldn't have to go through all the hurt that his wife and he did the first trip around.

Meredith walked out of her office wanting to talk to Maggie and see if Derek or Addison or both set up an appointment. She walked over to her secretary's desk and smiled.

"Hey Maggie. Do I have any appointments for Derek or Addison soon?" She asked, standing in front of Maggie.

Maggie looked up at Meredith. They had been friends, even if Meredith was her boss. They hung out after work occasionally and they really connected. Maggie looked back do to Meredith's schedule. She knew that Derek had set up an appointment for next week, _the soonest as possible_ he told her. However, his wife Addison didn't set up an appointment. Maggie had watched Addison quickly walk out of the office. Maggie looked back up at Meredith.

"Yeah…Derek set up an appointment for Monday morning at nine o'clock." Meredith's heart rate raised up a level when Maggie told her about Derek's appointment. This was crazy, she thought. She couldn't be thinking about a patient in that way. It wasn't right. It wasn't ethical. However, she couldn't stop herself. He had left her office about fifty minutes ago and she could still remember the color of his eyes. She shook her head and smiled back at Maggie.

"Thank you. Do I have any other appointments for the day?" Meredith asked when she heard her voice being called by a very familiar voice.

"Meredith." He walked into her office and smiled at her form as she talked with her secretary. He loved her small figure. Most men would tell her to eat a cheeseburger; however he loved the way she looked. He always imagined how her warm milky skin would feel under his hands. How her body would feel pressed up against his. He watched as Meredith turned around and smiled at him.

"Mark. I thought it was too early for you to be up." She teased him. They had just got off the phone not too long ago and he told her that he was going back to sleep. Mark smiled his famous grin at her. Of course she would tease him when he came to see her. That was Meredith, and they were friends. He didn't expect anything less.

"Well you know when you call me I can't go back to sleep." He winked at her and then smiled at Maggie. He had always liked Maggie, in a friendly way. Mark turned back to Meredith, noticing her roll her eyes at him.

"I can't believe you just lied to me." She laughed.

"I didn't lie." He remarked.

"Oh yes you did. You said that when I call you, you don't go back to sleep. That's a lie, because how many times do I call you and you go back to sleep right after?" She said, walking towards her office – knowing that he would follow her.

"Oh well…sometimes I don't go back to sleep and today is one of those days." He said following her watching how her body looked in the tight skirt and suit jacket. He wanted to show her how he felt about her, he wanted more than sex from her. He wanted everything. Mark wasn't known for settling down, but he would for Meredith.

"Oh so you've lied to me before then?" She laughed as she sat down on the couch. She patted the seat next to her, to make him sit down. Mark sat down on his side of the couch as his body turned towards her.

"Maybe." He laughed, he wouldn't be able to get out of this situation. He really needed to stop thinking these thoughts. Mark Sloan never got nervous, but he did when the thoughts about telling Meredith how he truly felt came to mind. She would probably laugh and tell him that he was making it up. He just wanted to get her into his bed or something – like she always had. He had told her, or at least tried to tell her, how he really felt but she always blew it off – saying he just needed to get laid, when she told him that he just laughed it off and said that she was probably right. And then he found some slutty woman and fucked her as he thought about what he really wanted to do to Meredith. All of the woman that he had ever been with were nothing compared to Meredith. Meredith was smart, loving, kind, caring, and amazing. She was the epitome of the perfect woman. She was beautiful. Yet, he would never have her because she believed that he just wanted her for sex.

"So…what are you doing here? I mean…I love seeing you, but why are you here? on a Friday morning?" She asked, honestly curious.

"I'm starving and I wanted to know if you wanted to go get breakfast." He stated. They ate together when they had the time. Mark finally had a morning off and he wanted to spend it with his best friend. He waited for her answer.

Meredith looked out in the hallway and remembered that she was asking Maggie a question before Mark came in. She stood up and smiled at him, flattening out her skirt. "I'll be right back. See if I am available." She said as she walked out the door and back to Maggie.

"Maggie…sorry that I left." She said smiling at Maggie once again.

"Oh it's okay. When I saw Mark I knew it was going to happen. I knew either he was going to pull you away or you were going to walk off." She winked at Meredith. Maggie, unlike Meredith, knew that Mark was in love with her. Every time that she saw Mark and Meredith together she could see the way that Mark looked at Meredith. It was like Meredith was the only woman in the world. Yes, occasionally, he smiled at her, but it was never the way that he looked at Meredith. Maggie just hoped that one day that Meredith would see what was in front of her.

"I don't do that all the time."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do."

"Stop arguing with your boss." Meredith said rolling her eyes.

"I'm not arguing with my boss…right now I am arguing with my friend." Maggie laughed, as she looked down at Meredith's schedule one last time.

"Oh whatever." Meredith laughed in return.

"You don't have any other appointments the rest of the day." Maggie told Meredith as she smiled at her.

"Really? That is unusual. Are you sure?" Meredith asked, pleasantly surprised but still surprised. Meredith never really had a day when she was free.

"Yes. I'm sure. No appointments." Maggie nodded her head.

"Okay thank you. You can take the rest of the day off. You deserve it, although I do think you are wrong." Meredith said as she walked away from a laughing Maggie and back into her office where Mark was standing looking at her pictures for the millionth time.

Meredith stood in the doorway and smiled as she watched Mark look at the pictures of them together. She always kept their pictures in her office. He was her best friend, he probably always would be. She watched him as he ran his hand gingerly over the picture frame. It wasn't like this was Meredith's first time watching Mark as he looked at her, well their, pictures. When she watched Mark she always felt happy and peaceful. Meredith's reason for feeling this way was because he was her best friend. Sometimes Meredith wondered if there was something there, but she knew that there probably wasn't.

He was Mark the man whore and Meredith was the girl that has never been kissed. Yes, she had plenty of offers, but it never felt right. Meredith wanted to find that one man that she would spend the rest of her life with. She didn't want to be the girl that slept around. She didn't want to be one of those women that Mark fucked on Friday or Saturday nights. No…she wasn't that person. When people looked at her, they expected that she was that person, but once they got to know her they knew that she believed in forevers and love of a lifetimes. She had a crappy childhood with bad examples of love, but that never stopped her from believing in the ones.

So…as Meredith stood there watching Mark look at her pictures, she felt something that she would hide, because he was her best friend and nothing more. He had told her once or twice, maybe three times, that he liked her more than a best friend but she knew that he just wanted someone to fuck, because he usually told her when he wasn't having sex with anybody. Little did she know that those were the moments that Mark was trying to profess his love to her. He didn't sleep with any girls around that time because he wanted to prove to Meredith that he loved her and more than in a sexual way.

Mark was about to walk over to the next bookshelf with all of her awards and novels, when he noticed that Meredith was looking at him, as she leaned against the door. Meredith noticed Mark turn around and she just smiled, her arms crossed over her chest.

"I'm free. I have nothing to do today. Surprising isn't it?" She laughed as she straightened up but her form was still against the doorway.

Mark walked away from the bookshelves and over to Meredith. He nodded his head. "Yes…very surprising. Meredith is actually free from crazy couples." He laughed. Meredith just shook her head.

"So what did you have in mind for breakfast?" She asked him as she walked around him over to her desk to get her briefcase, placing her wallet and information of some of next week's patients inside. When Meredith walked around Mark, he was enveloped with the scent of lavender and Meredith. He was paying attention to her scent when she asked him the question, so he barely comprehended what she said.

Meredith walked back over to him and laughed, seeing that his eyes were closed ever so softly. She stood in front of him with her briefcase to her side.

"Have you fallen asleep on me?" She murmured with a playful tone.

Mark opened his eyes quickly and smiled at her. "Nope. Just closing my eyes for a second." He took a deep breath. He couldn't tell her why his eyes were really closed, because if he did…she wouldn't believe him.

"Okay good. You can't fall asleep on me at breakfast. That would just be rude, especially since you are the one that asked me." She laughed as Mark and her walked out of her office. She closed the door and locked it behind her.

"Oh come on. Please." Mark said sarcastically. "And plus…you were the one that said yes to breakfast so it would be rude of you to fall asleep." They both laughed as they exited her office building. Meredith paused as they stepped outside, the rays of sun hitting her skin. She smiled and closed her eyes. She loved the sun and how it made her body warm. It was becoming spring soon, and it was her favorite time of the year because it signified new beginnings. She took a deep breath of the smell of the air around her and then opened her eyes and turned back to Mark.

"So…what did you have in mind? So I can meet you there." She asked, but was surprised when Mark grabbed her arm gently and pulled her towards his car.

"Nope…you are going with me. We will get your car later." He laughed and Meredith rolled her eyes and shook her head. She stopped and he stopped, turning around to look at her.

"Well…can we drop my car off at my house then? I can't leave it here all by itself. It will get lonely." She said, in a winey tone.

Mark rolled her eyes at her as he let go of her arm. "Why? Your car will be fine."

"But what if it isn't?"

"I will buy you a new one." Mark said confidently.

"But I love my car."

"You will love the new car I get you." He said again, even more confidently.

"I have important stuff in there."

"No you don't."

"How do you know?" She asked him, placing a hand on her hip and raising her eyebrow up at him.

Mark shook his head as Meredith placed her hand on his hip. It shouldn't get to him, but she looked very sexy with all the confidence she had and how her body curved when her hand met her hip. This shouldn't bother him…but it did. "Because you Meredith Grey never keep important stuff in your car. Probably the most important thing in your car is a piece of trash from McDonalds…and you can get one of those later." He laughed for the facial expression Meredith now had. She was speechless. Mark read her like a book, he knew her.

"So come on Meredith. We can take my car and if anything happens to it I will buy you a new car and I will get you a piece of trash from McDonalds." He laughed and Meredith walked up to him smacking his arm.

"You are a jackass." She muttered as she walked to his car.

"Ouch." He said placing his left hand on his arm over the spot he hit. It didn't hurt that bad, but he needed to give her the gratification that she hurt him even if it was a small bit. She noticed the smirk on her face as she stood at his car waiting for him. Mark grabbed his keys and walked over to Meredith. He unlocked her door first, letting her step in and he shut the door for her. Then walking around the car and unlocking his door, he knew that she wouldn't unlock it for her because what he told her, so he didn't mind. He smiled at her as he sat down in his brand new Aston Martin. He started his car and turned the radio to his favorite channel which happened to be Meredith's too.

Mark turned onto the road and started driving to their destination for breakfast. While he was driving, they bickered. It was either his singing or her food choices. Whatever it was they were being best friends and laughing and teasing each other. They both were happy to be in each others company. They both needed relief from what had been happening lately in their lives. Both were keeping something from each other. For Mark, it was the relationship that he had messed up and the friendship he had lost. For Meredith, it was the blue-eyed patient.

When Mark arrived at his destination of choice for breakfast, Meredith looked over at him and smiled. It was the place that they had met. Meredith had been having dinner with one of her clients and Mark was having dinner with his mother. When Mark and Meredith met they were both headed towards the bathroom, Mark was on the phone as was Meredith and they bumped into each other. Somehow, someway they kept talking for a while and at the end of their conversation they exchanged phone numbers. Mark had called Meredith the next day and then from that point on they became the best friends that they are now.

"I love this place." Mark shrugged, with a grin on his face when Meredith smiled at him.

"Me too." She said softly and took off her seat belt getting out of the car. Mark followed suit.

They walked up to the door, Mark opening the door for Meredith. They walked up to the front desk and smiled at the waitress. For this restaurant you usually needed a reservation but with how many times Meredith and Mark came in they didn't anymore. They just walked in and someone found them a seat, sometimes they had to wait for a seat, but that didn't bother them. They didn't have to wait that long.

"Hi Casey." Meredith said to the waitress.

"Hey guys. I can't believe you two are here this early." She laughed. "I thought Mark liked to sleep in." She smirked at him. Casey was another girl that knew how Mark felt about Meredith. Casey and Mark were good friends, not best friends like Meredith and him but still good friends. One night when Meredith was at the office, Mark took Casey out to a bar and spilled how he truly felt for Meredith. Mark had never slept with Casey, because they were good friends and she knew how he felt.

"I know…I can't believe that he is up either." Meredith and Casey both laughed. Meredith bumped into Mark softly. She turned towards him and said "sorry" softly. He just shrugged his shoulders. He didn't mind. She could bump into him anytime she wanted.

"So, how about a table?" Mark asked Casey. She nodded her head grabbing two menus and walking to their favorite table. It was right by the window. Both, Mark and Meredith loved looking out the window where the New York City skyline met the water. It was peaceful and beautiful. Mark loved looking at Meredith as she looked out the window. She was just like the view, peaceful and beautiful.

Meredith and Mark ordered their food and talked about their lives. Although they spent a lot of time together, they still talked about everything from when they weren't together. They talked about their jobs, their clients. Mark talked about the best and some of the most annoying surgeries he had that week. While Meredith talked about some of the things their clients did.

They ate their meals in silence…Meredith stealing Mark's bacon and Mark stole Meredith's mushrooms off her omelet. Neither minded because it was just something they did. They looked out at their favorite site of the city. After they finished eating they left the restaurant after thanking Casey and went on with their days. Mark drove Meredith to her car, which was still there and in good condition. Mark teased Meredith about worrying about her old car so much. Meredith just rolled her eyes and told him that she would see him later that night for their drinks.

Mark watched as Meredith left and knew that he needed to explain to her how much she really did mean to him. He knew that one day she would know exactly how he felt. Whether she reacted the way he wanted her to, which was to jump in his arms and tell him that she loved him too, or if she told him what she usually told him: that he really needed to get laid. He just really needed to tell her how he felt. He was in love with his best friend and she needed to know it.

_Okay second chapter. I hope you liked. I really like it. You get to know how Meredith and Mark met. How Mark feels about Meredith. Please read and review. Constructive criticism is always welcome. _


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Disclaimer: Don't own Grey's Anatomy. Shonda does.

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Meredith drove home after her breakfast with Mark. To say that she loved spending time with Mark was an understatement, ever since they met several years ago she loved being with Mark. It didn't matter if they were watching movies, eating something, watching a movie, going to their bar, talking on the cell phone, or anything. She loved spending her time with her best friend. Mark had been there for Meredith through everything - her bad days, her good days, her very bad hair days. He had been there for her.

Meredith arrived at her apartment complex. She grabbed her briefcase and got out of the car. She looked up at the sky, the blue color of it making her heart race. She turned her head back down to the ground. Why did the color of the sky make her heart race? If Meredith was being completely honest with herself, she knew the reason. The reason was her patient, who had a wife. Meredith remembered the sincerity in his voice when he told her that if she knew what really happened with his wife, she would understand. His voice was filled with pain and anguish, but at the same time it was filled with hope. Maybe, he really wished that it worked out with his wife. Maybe, the hope was something else.

Meredith walked through the doors of her apartment complex, smiling softly at the lady at the front desk. She was pretty sure that the front desk lady was new, because Meredith had a habit of knowing everyone's name that she dealt with on a daily basis. Meredith was not always like this, but for some reason the career she was in now, changed her. Meredith walked over to the front desk.

"Hi. I'm Meredith Grey." She politely said.

"Hi." The blonde girl said back. "Can I help you with something?" She said rudely, filing her nails as she rested in the black chair.

"No…nevermind." Meredith said, turning away from the desk and walking over to the elevator.

Meredith wasn't this girl. Meredith was definitely not bright and shiny. However, this job changed her. It really must have changed her. Meredith took a breath in when the doors of the elevator opened. She stepped inside and noticing the few passengers inside. The doors closed behind her and she turned towards the front. That was when she saw the bright blue eyes looking back at her, his eyes intense.

Meredith took a deep breath in. No…this couldn't be happening. He did not live in her apartment complex. No. She calmed her appearance down, but her mind and inside of her body were shaking. She wasn't scared, she shouldn't be, but she was nervous. He didn't live in her apartment complex, did he? When did he move in? Why did he move in? The elevators in front of Meredith opened and people pushed passed her walking out of the elevator – leaving Meredith and the blue eyed wonder alone.

She didn't say anything, she just stared ahead. Which was probably a bad idea considering that he was staring at her reflection in the mirror. He smiled at her and she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before she opened her eyes and smiled back at him. He took a step towards her.

"Hi." He said softly, like others would be listening. However, they were the only ones in the elevator.

"Hi." She responded back just as softly.

"You live here?" He asked, still looking at her reflection.

"Yes. Do you?" She asked, wanting the answer to the question that had been going through her mind ever since she noticed him in the elevator with him.

"Just moved in today actually." He smiled at her. That was when Meredith noticed his attire. He was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans along with a white t-shirt. His hair was pushed back out of his face. If it was possible, he looked better now than he did that morning when she saw him in his black pants, light blue shirt and blue tie. Meredith was a woman for suits, however, Derek and his clothing was slowly changing that.

"Really?" She asked, wanting to continue the conversation, but not completely sure at what to say.

"Yep." He smiled at her.

Meredith couldn't handle the looking through the mirror anymore. She needed to turn around and look at him. It probably wasn't the best idea because she lost her breath looking at the real version of him. He looked even better than his reflection, and Meredith knew that was crazy because reflections looked just like the person.

"Well that's interesting."

"Oh really?" Derek smirked at her. _Stupid, stupid smirk that makes me weak in the knees, _thought Meredith

"How is that interesting?" Derek smirked at her again.

"Um…" Meredith bit her bottom lip as she thought of a reason. She knew that Derek knew that he was sexy, handsome, amazingly hot, pretty god looking. She knew that he knew that. She also knew that she liked looking as his body. His body was such a fun sight to look at.

Meredith stopped herself from biting her lip and just shrugged her shoulders. She couldn't let her patient get to her. "I don't know…it just is." She said turning back around, closing her eyes and taking another deep breath, bringing her hand up to her chest, feeling her heart rate. Meredith was pretty sure she was going to have a heart attack in the next few days because of this man.

Meredith heard Derek's laughter and that when she remembered that there was a mirror in front of her. Her cheeks turned a deep scarlet color.

"Why is this elevator taking so long today?" She muttered under her breath. Just then the elevator door opened and it was her floor. She walked out and was about to say goodbye to Derek when she noticed that he was getting off the elevator. What was he doing? Following her?

It seemed that Derek was able to read her facial expression, and he placed his hand up to his chest, grabbing the top of his shirt. "I guess we live on the same floor." He shrugged and smiled at her.

"What? No. You can't live on my floor. I can't live on the same floor as you." Meredith said, her eyes widening while her mind was going wild.

"Why not?" Derek laughed softly.

"Because I can't live on the same floor as my patient." She said, walking away from him, her suitcase swinging in the wind as she walked quickly to her room.

"Why not?" He asked again not seeing the problem. Actually, he liked the idea of living on the same floor as her.

_Because I like looking at you and the more that you are away, the less I don't see you…the less I have to worry about embarrassing myself in front of you. _"Because…just because." She said, grabbing her keys and looking at him before she walked into her apartment, closing the door.

Her apartment was one of her havens, one of the places she could go when she needed escape from the world or blue eyes that were really making her want to do things, things she had never done before.

Meredith looked around her apartment and over to her couch, and she was about to sit down when she heard someone knock on her door. She looked between the door and the couch. The couch looked a lot more inviting than opening the door did right now, so she sat down on her couch hearing someone knock on the door again. She guessed that it was Derek. She had nothing against Derek; she really didn't but she afraid of what she would do when she saw him. She had the nagging feeling that she would do the most embarrassing thing or she would jump into his arms and kiss him. No she couldn't do that. He was a patient, trying to save his marriage. Or at least he was in her marriage counseling sessions with his wife. She couldn't disrupt them in their progress…well if they were going to make progress.

The knocking on her door had stopped and she smiled as she rested her head against the back of the couch and controlled herself and her thoughts.

Her cell phone started ringing and she knew that it was number she didn't know because it was the most common ringtone: the sound of an actual phone. Her friends had songs that either conveyed their personalities or their friendship. Meredith reached into the pocket of her suit pocket and sighed as she answered the phone.

"Hello…this is Meredith Grey." She said in a professional tone.

"Do you know how rude it is to not answer your door?" The man on the phone laughed.

Meredith growled as she got up off her couch and walked over to the door. She looked through the peep-hole and noticed that Derek was standing there.

"Do you know why I didn't answer my door?" She said, in a plain tone.

"Because you couldn't hear it?" He laughed. "But you heard your cell phone. So I don't know." He laughed again. His laughter put a smile on Meredith's face although she was pretty annoyed with Derek Shepherd at the moment.

"Please do not tell me that you are going to be one of those neighbors that I have to put a restraining order on." She said in a playful tone.

"No…I was just wanting to ask you a question, then I was going to leave you to whatever you had to do."

"So…if I answer the door you will leave me alone?" She smiled at his expression in the peep-hole. It was a little hurt, but he still had a smile on his face.

"You know I haven't done this in a while. So I'm just going to ask, okay?" He asked, waiting for her response.

"What? You haven't talked on a cell phone for a while?" She teased him, because it was the only thing she could do, because she had a nerving idea that he was about to ask her out. But Meredith shook her head, he wouldn't ask her out right now would he? They just met?

"Will you go out with me?" He sounded nervous, hell he looked nervous too.

Meredith was silent on her side of the line. She had the feeling that he was about to ask her, but that was just her hoping. She wasn't actually expecting him to do it. She wanted to, there was no doubt in that, but she was scared and she couldn't. She couldn't go out with her clients.

"Derek…" She said, hoping that he knew what she meant.

And he did. "Just say yes. Pretend like I'm just Derek and you are just Meredith."

"But you are still married…"

"Not for long. I'm getting a divorce as soon as possible."

"Then why are you coming to sessions?" She asked him. If they were so set on getting a divorce, why did they even bother coming to a session.

"Nancy and Addison are best friends and Nancy is my sister. She basically drug me there. Not that I regret going after I saw you, but I really didn't want to go. It's a waste of my time, of your time, and of Addison's time. Although, I no longer care about Addison. When she cheated on me…well…I don't care about her anymore." He said, looking at her door.

"Derek…I don't know."

"Meredith…please. Just say yes."

Meredith's automatic thought was yes, but then she thought about her career and maybe that he was going to use her as a rebound. Her first date would not be a rebound. No…her first kiss would not be a rebound kiss. She wanted all the real passion of love.

"I can't. I won't be your rebound." Meredith said, a little bitterness in her tone, but not at him. The bitterness was towards her. She should have realized that she would have been his rebound girl.

"You wouldn't be a rebound Meredith." He said, more firmly. And Meredith knew that he was telling her the truth. Those few simple words wouldn't have meant anything if they came from another person, Meredith wouldn't have believed it. However, Meredith could tell that he was telling he the truth. From the few moments that he had talked to him, she knew him. At least, she knew parts of him. She knew what he smelled like. She knew that he looked better in casual clothing, than suits. She knew that he raked his hands through his hair when he was stressed. She knew that he was kind and truthful. And all those reasons were why she opened the door and smiled at him giving him his answer. Her answer was yes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Okay so this isn't the best chapter, but it's still cute. At least in my opinion. And yes I have decided that this is going to be a Meredith/Derek fic. I mean, I like Meredith and Mark together, but I just can't write that right now. Not when Derek and Meredith are happy on television. Anyway...I hope you enjoy this short update. Sorry that it's short. I'm just tired (which is why there might be a lot of errors). Please read and review. I appreciate all comments. Oh, and if someone wants to make me a banner. I would love you forever. Mwah!

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When Meredith stepped outside her door and smiled at Derek, Derek thought he was dreaming. He was really expecting to hear a no come from her soft pink lips. Okay, so soft pink lips were a bad choice of words, because Derek Shepherd automatically thought of a different set of lips. The lips that were under her jeans, her folds to her heaven. Derek shook his head and tried to shake the dirty thoughts from his head, but he couldn't. Every time that he looked at Meredith he thought dirty. However, at the same time he knew that, that was not going to happen. Meredith was different and what Derek told her was true. Meredith was not going to be his rebound.

Meredith was a kind woman. Her smiles made him melt no matter how cheesy that sounded. Her hair was a golden brown which when he saw a color even remotely close to her hair he automatically thought of her. Yes, Derek just met her today – in a marriage counseling meeting, in fact – but he couldn't shake her image from his head. No, he really liked thinking about her.

After his wife had cheated on him with his best friend, he was sure that he would never like a woman again. It didn't mean that he was going gay; no Derek loved vaginas too much for that. Which kinda made him sound like a manwhore, but he wasn't that either. He just knew what he liked. When he saw Meredith his thoughts about never liking a woman again vanished from his mind and he started liking her. He had a sense of compassion, a sense of security, a sense of happiness when he was around her. He didn't care how weird he sounded.

It was moments like these that Derek really wished that he hadn't lost his best friend. He wanted to go to the bar tonight and tell his best friend, or rather ex-best friend, about this wonderful woman that he had met. His best friend would have told him that he sounded mentally insane. Or that he just needed to get laid. His ex-best friend was the manwhore of New York, not a part of New York the whole city of New York. Maybe that was the reason that he went after his wife, soon to be ex-wife. He just needed another conquest since the city of New York was very quickly being conquered.

Derek shook his head yet again, and looked at the beautiful woman in front of him. He could not be thinking about parts of her anatomy, nor his screwed up wife when he was around her. All he needed to think about was that she said yes to going on a date and that he needed to make plans, quickly.

"Great." A smile as wide as Texas was placed on his face.

Meredith smiled at him, a little more shyly but still excited. She opened her door all the way and walked back to her comfy couch. She motioned for him to follow her. They needed to make plans. Meredith had never done this, but she was pretty sure that she needed to make plans, when they had a date coming up.

Meredith wanted to tell her best friend about this guy. She wanted to tell him everything about him, but Meredith knew that Mark would not listen because it was a girly issue. This was a time that Meredith really wished that her girl best friend lived in New York instead of Los Angeles, California. She really needed Cristina, to tell her how much of an idiot she was being. She needed Cristina's sarcasm and support. That was what she needed right now, because being truthfully honest – Meredith was about to freak out.

Derek walked into Meredith's apartment and looked at his surroundings. Everything was so clean and fresh. Yes there was a few messes around the places, strewn magazines on the floor and coffee table. There was a mess in the kitchen from take out food and there were notes on the dining room table. However, the rest of her house was spotless. There were pictures on the wall of some of the people in Meredith's life. Some paintings from what Derek could tell unknown artists. And bookshelves upon bookshelves holding thousands of books, all of the books looked as they had been read. There were creases in each book stem.

Derek turned back around to Meredith when he was done looking at her house. Her house could wait for another time, what was more important right now was deciding what they were going to do for their date. Derek wanted to do something unusual. He really didn't want to do dinner and a movie. He knew that Meredith deserved something better than that.

Meredith smiled at Derek when he looked back at her. She could tell that he was thinking, because of the look in his eyes. He looked as if he wanted to say something but wasn't completely sure what to say because he didn't know what she wanted to hear. Although the look was a little weird for Meredith to see, she still smiled at him and patted the cushion next to her on the couch.

"So…" Meredith said as Derek took a seat next to her, not too close, but not too far away either.

"So…" Derek laughed at her as he turned his body towards her.

"Well…I think we need to make plans for this date or I don't think there will be a date." Meredith shrugged her shoulders. She really wanted this date to happen. This would be her first date and she was scared, but she couldn't show that to Derek. He couldn't know that she had never done this before.

"I think you're right." Derek laughed an easy laugh again.

"So what do you have in mind?" Meredith asked, hoping that he had an answer. She really wasn't good at making plans on the spot.

Derek noticed something as he looked into her beautiful green eyes. It looked a little like nervousness, Derek just passed it off. Everyone was nervous. Hell, he was nervous. He needed for her to like him. He needed for this date to go well. He needed to choose what they should do on their date.

"What is your favorite thing to do? Absolute favorite. I don't care how crazy it sounds." Derek smiled at her, hoping to get the most honest answer from her.

Meredith thought over the question that Derek just presented to her. He wanted to know her absolute favorite thing. Right now, that was spending time with her best friend, Mark, or drinking. She had to have something else than those two things. Okay, so she also liked looking at his blue eyes, but she couldn't tell him that either. Meredith looked at him and then around her house trying to think of her absolute favorite thing.

"I like taking pictures?" She said as a statement, but it sounded more like a question.

Derek looked at her quizzically. "You don't know if you like to take pictures or not?" He laughed.

"No…I do like to take pictures but I don't know how we can incorporate that into our date." She said, hoping that she could come up with something better than taking pictures. She went through her mental checklist to think of something more fun and more date worthy.

"I like to…um…" she paused, and then it came to her "look up at the night sky. I love looking at the stars, although you can barely see them in the New York City lights. The stars calm me. They make me feel like I'm not alone. They make me happy." She smiled at him, hoping that this time her answer fulfilled the date requirements.

Derek smiled a smile for her. This smile was a new smile, Meredith noticed. It wasn't a bad smile. No, it was a smile that was more amazing, more attractive than his other smiles. If that was at all possible. Meredith smiled back at him. It felt like this smile was made just for her.

"We can do that. We can do that for our first date." Derek smiled that smile again. It made her knees feel weak.

"Okay." Meredith smiled at him again. Actually, she just kept smiling at him.

"Okay. When is the best day for you?" Derek asked.

"Um…I'm good at nights. So whatever time that you are available."

"What about tomorrow night? I know that it is a Saturday and it's a little late to be making plans now, but I am free tomorrow and it's going to be a clear sky and I know the perfect place to go to look at the night sky." Derek eyes were hopeful and his expression warm.

Meredith thought about the next day and remembered that she didn't have any plans which was kind of weird, but it made her that much more excited because she would be seeing Derek again soon.

"I'm pretty sure that I am free tomorrow. It's a once in a while thing actually. So I guess you are lucky." Meredith teased him.

Derek leaned in closer to her and whispered. "I really do think I am."

Meredith's breath hitched, she pulled back. She couldn't kiss him right now. They both knew that. Yes, they were alone, but Meredith didn't want her first kiss to mean nothing and Derek wanted to prove that she was more than a rebound and kissing her right now was not going to prove that.

"So…" Derek said pulling away. "I think I'm going to go. I have to unpack some, and then I need to go make reservations." Meredith looked at Derek quizzically.

"You need to make reservations?"

"Yes…if you want to see the night sky at it's best I need to make reservations." He said smiling as he stood up and looked at Meredith.

"You can call me if you need anything. Even if you want the date to come sooner." He laughed softly.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Ego. Such a big ego." She muttered softly to herself, but Derek heard her. He wanted to tell her that his ego wasn't that big and that if it was that there were things much bigger.

"Goodbye Meredith. I will call you later, tell you what time if that is okay."

"Yes. That's perfectly fine. However, if you call later tonight I might not pick up. I am going out with my best friend tonight." Meredith smiled, thinking about her plans with Mark. Although really, right now she just wanted to see Mark to tell him about the man that she was going to spend her first date with tomorrow.

"Okay." Derek felt a tinge of jealousy which was way too ridiculous.

"Goodbye Derek." Meredith smiled as she watched him walk out her door. She looked at the door and thought about the conversation that they just had. Then Meredith stood up quickly and ran to her room, in a panic. She had the womanly curse, she didn't have anything to wear.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**Disclaimer: ** I do not own Grey's Anatomy. However, I do own Grey's Anatomy posters and everything with Patrick Dempsey and Eric Dane.

I hope that you like this update. If you don't, still comment it.

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Meredith sat there on her couch; way after Derek had left her apartment. She looked around her place and thought about Derek. She thought about the way that he made her feel, the way he smiled at her, and the way that she liked to look at him. This was all new to Meredith. She had never been in a relationship. Yes, she had plenty of offers but she believed that she shouldn't waste her time when she wasn't sure about the person, when she could spend that time with her friends or working on getting to where she was now. Meredith didn't believe in one-night stands, unlike her best friend…

Meredith looked over at the clock when she thought about Mark. It was there night to spend together and all Meredith was doing was thinking about her date tomorrow. She looked at the clock and noticed that it was six-thirty. She only had a few minutes to get ready. Yes, seven o'clock was early to go out and drink, but Meredith and Mark always went out to eat before they went drinking. That way they could spend more time together without being too drunk off their asses.

Meredith ran over to her bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was in place, she was lucky about that because that meant she didn't really have to take a shower. She did need to retouch her make-up and change into a pair of jeans a comfy t-shirt. That was the one thing that Meredith loved most about Mark. She could be her real self around him. She didn't have to look perfect. Yes, she tired to. However, she could be horribly sick and in her worst outfit, no make-up and her hair everywhere and he would still think that she was beautiful. She was a lucky girl to have a best friend like Mark Sloan.

Meredith did everything that she needed to do to look a little better for her evening with Mark. She went to her closet and chose a pair of light blue jeans and a black deep v shirt that flowed away from her, but still accentuated her curves. Meredith was a woman and although she had a date tomorrow, she still liked the feeling when men noticed her. It was all the fun, especially when she told him that she wasn't available or that she didn't want to take them home.

She looked at herself in the mirror one last time, and then walked away grabbing her red purse, keys and wallet. She walked out the door, locking it behind her. She looked down the hall, towards Derek's room. His door was closed, but Meredith did see a light coming from underneath it. She smiled thinking that she would be sharing her first date with him. She took one last look at his room and then turned and went to the elevator.

She exited her apartment building and headed towards her car. She was looking in her purse and then looked up as she found her keys. She noticed a dark figure standing by her car and she stopped. She looked around her and was about to call for help, seeing as the person was leaning against her car. However, then she noticed the form of the person and growled.

"You scared the shit out of me, Mark."

Meredith heard his chuckle and she walked up to him, hitting him on his arm, the second time that day. Mark smiled a grin at her, as he nursed the spot that she hit with his hand.

"What are you doing here anyway? We are supposed to meet at the ferry boats aren't we?"

"Well I just decided that I should come over here. I want to go somewhere different." He smiled at her as he opened the driver side door for her and then went over to his side, opening the door, jumping inside.

"What? Have you fucked all the women on that side of the city?" She looked over to him as she started her car. She noticed something in his eyes and she automatically felt bad. Mark looked sad, he looked hurt. And Mark Sloan never looked hurt. "Sorry." She muttered as she looked behind her and drove out of her spot.

"No…it's okay. However, I don't think I have." Mark smirked at her watching her drive. They drove onto the highway and Mark gave her directions to a new bar. One she had never been to. Meredith thought that Mark had, because he gave her the directions. They found a parking spot close enough to the bar and then walked inside. It was similar to their old bar; however, it felt a little more comfy, homey. She felt safe in this bar. It wasn't as loud and the bartender looked nice, a little gay and nice.

Mark led Meredith up to the bar and sat down beside her on one of the comfy bar stools.

Once they ordered their drinks a single malt scotch for Mark and tequila for Meredith, she looked over at him. "So…have you been here before?" She smiled at him.

"Yeah. It's my favorite bar." Mark smiled back at her. This bar was the bar that he went to when he had to talk to someone about Meredith, a person that didn't know her.

"Why have you never taken me here before?" She said, turning her body towards him and from the corner of her eye noticing that Joe, the bartender, was pouring their drinks.

"I guess I've just never thought about it." He shrugged. In all honesty, Mark just didn't want others to know who he was truly talking about. However, tonight Mark was going to truly tell Meredith how he felt. He was going to tell her what he did. Tell her about everything in his life, especially how he loved her. Mark smiled at her. "Sorry."

"It's okay." Meredith turned her body back towards the bar. There was something fishy going on. Mark told her everything, or at least she used to think so. She grabbed the shot glass of tequila and pressed it against her lips, tilting her head back and letting the amber liquid burn as it went down her throat. Mark watched her drink, and he took a drink of his scotch.

"So why did you bring me here? I mean…if you've never told me of this place before, why are you taking me here now?" She asked him, wanting to know the truth.

"Just thought it would be a better place to be."

Meredith shook her head at him, and then let a frown grace her face. She shouldn't let this ruin her night. She had things to tell him, big things. Things that were so massive she needed to tell him even if she didn't want him to know. Although, she did want him to know, she just did not know how to tell him.

They both stayed silent for several minutes, which was very unlike them. When they were together, they usually could not stop talking. Mark kept looking at Meredith, afraid of how he was going to tell her that he loved her more than a friend. Mark knew that she probably going to just make a joke out of it, but he needed to tell her how he really truly felt. He needed for her to believe him.

Meredith looked back at Mark. She couldn't stand the silence any longer. And this silence was stupid. It was very, very stupid. They were best friends. She shouldn't have gotten mad at Mark because he had never told her about this place. It was his secret place, and she was here with him now. She knew it was stupid of her to get mad at him.

There eyes connected and Meredith was about to bring up the subject of her date. Better now than later, she thought to herself. However, Mark stopped her.

"Meredith." He said softly, like he wanted to tell her something but didn't want any body else to hear. Meredith knew what he was about to do. But she shook her head and quickly told him something that would hurt him more than he had ever been hurt before, unbeknownst to her.

"Mark…I have a date tomorrow. Can you believe it? My first date." Meredith smiled at him. She couldn't have him tell her that he loved her. She knew it wasn't true. He couldn't love her like that.

Mark looked back at her and then away from her. He couldn't look at her right now, because his heart was honestly breaking. It felt like his heart was shattering to pieces, and that did not happen to Mark Sloan. No one had broken his heart before, but now Meredith had. She was going on a date with another guy. His Meredith never went out on dates, so he knew that this guy was something special to her. He wanted to turn and look at her, but his body wouldn't allow it. Mark knew that if he was to look at her, the tears would fall from his eyes. And Mark Sloan did not cry.

"Mark." Meredith said softly, with a little nervousness in her voice. This wasn't Mark; he didn't not look at her. When he didn't respond to his name, she placed her hand on his arm, trying to get his attention. Meredith did not expect Mark to flinch at her touch. His eyes looked at her.

"Meredith…please do not touch me." He said trying to stay calm, but his voice gave away to the sadness. His voice shook when he said her name.

Meredith looked into his eyes and saw the sadness and heartbreak.

"Mark…" She said pulling her hand away from him. "What's wrong?"

Was the fact that she was going on her first date actually hurting him that badly? Or was it something else, entirely?

"Nothing. Nothing is wrong with me." He said, drinking the rest of his scotch and told Joe to keep them coming.

"Mark…do not lie to me." Meredith said a little sternly.

Mark turned his body towards her, his black leather jacket falling off the chair because of how fast he turned around.

"Meredith…you don't want the truth, you wouldn't believe the truth because every time I tell you…you do not believe me. So maybe I don't want to tell you the truth. Okay? Do you understand that?" Mark was angry and he was taking it out on her. He was not mad at Meredith. He could never be mad at Meredith. He was mad at himself. He had let her go. Yes, this was one date. However, he knew his Meredith. She never dated because she hadn't found the one yet. He wasn't the one for her, Mark told himself. So he had to let her go. But he couldn't let her go. It would kill him to see her on a date with another man. It would kill him if he wasn't able to take her out on a date. It was killing him to not be the one that she decided to go on a date with. Mark knew that Meredith was the love of his life and this was coming from the man that didn't believe in forevers. So, when he thought that about Meredith, he knew it was true.

"Mark…tell me anyway." Meredith said, placing her hand over his. She knew that he told her not to touch him, but he was her best friend and she had to comfort him in the best way she knew how.

Mark pulled his hand out of her embrace.

"Meredith." He said, taking a deep breath. "Do you want to know why I am hurting so badly right now? Why my heart is breaking right now?" He paused looking into her eyes. "It's because of you. I love you Meredith. I always have. At first, I loved you just like a best friend should but after that I fell in love with you. Your smile, your laughter, the color of your eyes, your kindness, everything about you made me fall in love with you. Mark Sloan doesn't fall in love, but I fell in love with you. You are so beautiful. You are so kind. You know me better than anyone.

And I keep telling you this, but you do not believe me. Why don't you believe me? Is it the fact that I screw women every weekend? Do you want to know why I screw all of these women?" He paused and saw the shocked look on her face. "It's because I am trying to get over you. Because you don't believe that I love you. Every time I leave with a woman I think about you. I think about how much I love you. Every time I have sex with those other women, I feel horrible afterwards because I feel like I am cheating on you. Do you know how crazy that sounds?"

Mark took a deep breath and drank the rest of his drink, grabbing his coat off the floor and then turning back to her.

"I love you Meredith. Why can't you just accept that?" Mark was about to turn away when he rushed to her body and placed her in his embrace. Kissing her lips so softly, so full of love. He ran his hands up and down her back and then pulled away from the kiss.

"I'm not sorry for the kiss. However, I am sorry that I am not the man that you want me to be."

Meredith watched as Mark left the bar. She raised her fingertips up to her still tingling lips. She had a small smile on her face, but she was so confused. Her mind was running a thousands miles per hour. Usually when Mark told her that he loved her, he just said so. But tonight he gave her a speech. A speech about how much she hurt him, how much he was in love with her. Meredith shook her head, placing her hand in her lap. He couldn't love her. They were just best friends. Nothing more. However, the way that he kissed her was amazing. He made her feel sparks all through her body. She felt excitement and fear. She felt happiness and sadness. She felt every emotion in the book with Mark. She didn't know if she loved him or not.

Meredith got up off her seat and quickly ran after Mark. He was still standing outside waiting for a cab. She walked over to him. She stood directly in front of him. He was looking everywhere but at her. He could smell the lavender from her hair. He could feel her warm breath on him. However, he didn't pay attention. Yes, his mind told him to talk to her, wrap his arms around her and kiss her again. However, he couldn't. She didn't love him in that way.

"Mark." Meredith said softly.

"What Meredith?" Mark said, gruffly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know how you truly felt. You are a great guy…" Meredith was cut off by Mark.

"But I'm not the guy for you."

"I don't know that." Meredith said just as sadly as Mark had told her.

"Why can't you give me a chance then Meredith?"

"A chance? What kind of chance do you want?" Meredith asked, quizzically.

"I want to take you out on a date."

"Mark." How many time was she going to say his name tonight.

"Meredith." He countered. This was going to be his one chance at a date and he wanted to take it.

"I don't know." Meredith said shrugging her shoulders.

"I don't either. But it's worth a shot right?" He asked her.

"I guess."

"You guess." He said more as a statement. His heart was still breaking, but not as bad right now.

"I guess we should go on a date. I mean…I know for sure how you feel now."

Mark smiled for the first time that night, a real smile. "Okay. Sounds good. Do you want to make it sooner or later?" He asked her.

"Let's do it next week okay? How about Friday since that is our designated day?" She smiled at him.

"Sure. I will think of something to do. And I will call you with details okay?" Mark placed his arms around Meredith, embracing her in a hug as she told him okay. Her small, fragile arms wrapped around him as well. She put her head against his chest and smiled. However, Meredith was nervous. She had two dates and she hadn't done this type of thing before. She was happy her best friend wasn't happy anymore. So she forgot about her dates and just thought about how happy she was with him. Instead of going back in the bar they left to go watch movies at his place. Both of them were just happy to be with each other. They both just needed their best friend.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6.**

**Yeah this one is short. It is more like a filler than anything else. I'm not completely sure if I like this update, but it is still important. I think towards the end I keep repeating myself, but I really don't know how to change it. Haha. Anyway...please read and review as always. I appreciate the comments I have received so far. Thank you. Keep them coming. Oh, and if someone could make me a banner I would appreciate it. I hope I haven't really lost readers after the Mark kiss. It was important. Mark has feelings for Meredith and he needed to prove to her that he did. He was tired of him avoiding her and thinking that he was lying to her. So he kissed her to show her the true passion. I'm still leaning towards Meredith/Derek. However, I might write this story in two versions. So please have patience about Meredith and Derek getting together or Meredith and Mark, because this story has many developments. I can't honestly say when whoever is together forever and always. Okay...so that was my little rant. I hope you love reading my story. I love you for doing so. Always love.**

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After watching a few movies with Mark, a chick flick and a manly movie, she left his place. She found out that he didn't drive his car over to his place. He took a cab so she didn't have to care about driving him to her house just to get his car. They hugged once, after Mark reminded her that they had a date. The whole time that they spent together, she didn't think of anything other than being happy. Not that the dates made her unhappy, it just made her nervous. What if her date with Mark ruined their friendship? She couldn't stand to lose that. However, she kept her fears to herself and smiled at him, telling him that she would see him later, either tomorrow morning or Sunday.

She drove back to her place trying to keep her mind on the road, but her mind kept straying to the fact that she didn't know what to do. Meredith hated this feeling, because Meredith Grey always knew what to do. It was her job to know what to do. She fixed people relationships, made them happy. She laughed at the irony of it. She helped people in their relationships, told them what they needed to do and here she was trying to figure out herself what she needed to do.

When she arrived at her apartment, she looked down the hall at Derek's apartment then shook her head as she walked inside. Meredith smiled at the comfort of her place - not that she didn't feel comfortable at Marks, or being around Derek – her place just made her feel more comfortable. Like all the problems of the world couldn't affect her in her apartment. She took off her black jacket placing it on the hook that was next to the door.

As she walked into her apartment she started taking off articles of clothing that weren't needed. First she took off her shoes, then her shirt, then her skirt. All she was left wearing was her black panties and black bra, both which were made of lace. Her friends always asked her why she wanted to buy sexy underwear and bras if she wasn't going to use them. Her only response for them was that they made her feel sexy. Her friends scoffed at her because they all thought she was absolutely gorgeous. She didn't have any reason to not that she wasn't. Her figure was small. Her blonde hair accentuated her green eyes and vice versa. She was thin, but she still had curves. Her breasts were the perfect size. Her friends joked with her, telling her that she should go around naked all the time. And although the thought was tempting, she didn't do that. Unless she was in the comfort of her own home, like she was now.

She walked into her kitchen after stripping herself of most clothing. She went over to the fridge because she was hungry. She was hungry most of the time. Although she had a small frame, she still ate all the time. Girls were jealous of her, and guys well they loved that quality about her. She looked in her fridge and decided on the day old cold pizza. Cold pizza was her favorite thing to eat. It was a thing that she learned to love in college.

She grabbed herself a bottle of water from her fridge and took it and the pizza into the living room. Yes, she should be tired. However, it was a Friday night and she couldn't go to bed just yet. She sat down on her comfortable dark brown couch and then grabbed the remote, turning her forty two inch plasma television on. She flipped through the channels until she found something half way enjoyable.

She tried to get into the television show, but her mind kept wandering to other things that were more important in that moment, like Derek and Mark.

They were both great guys. Well, from what she knew Derek was a good guy and she knew Mark so she knew that he was a good guy.

They had many similar qualities. They both were good looking. They had a touch of cockiness, but that was a good thing in her eyes. Sometimes it was too much, but neither Mark nor Derek had shown that quite yet. They both smiled at her in the way that made her knees go weak. She felt comfortable around both of them. They were both kind. And, they both looked good in suits.

Even though Meredith could list several good qualities, she wasn't quite confident in what she was doing.

Meredith didn't want to worry. So she tried once more to make herself think about the show that was currently on t.v. However, she still didn't think about the show. She stayed there for several minutes trying to figure out what she show was about. She kept trying to not think about anything else. Many people found entertainment in the uselessness of television. Meredith couldn't find the reason why. Television to her was useless and boring. The only real reason she bought the television was because of Mark. He was the one that told her that she should get it. It was top of the line and it would be great for their movie nights. She reluctantly agreed to buy it and now it was on her wall, barely used.

Meredith stood up and turned off the tv. She wasn't going to find any use out of it tonight. She took her pizza and water with her. She went back to the kitchen after turning the music up. She didn't know what she was going to do. She needed to call Cristina. However, she knew that it was too late even on the west coast. Cristina was working, fucking some guy she barely knew, or sleeping. She didn't need Meredith to interrupt any of those, even if they were best friends.

Meredith put her food away and then headed to her bedroom. If her mind wasn't going to let her body wasn't going to let her think of anything else. Well, she was going to go to bed. It just meant she do more things in the meantime.

She covered herself up with her comforter and looked up at the ceiling. She tried to sleep. She looked up at the ceiling, and then her eyes began to shut. Her body was finally going to let her relax. The last thing that Meredith remembered thinking about was her problems, which weren't really problems. However, the last image she remembered filtering through her head was the smile that Derek Shepherd gave her, earlier that morning.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7.**

**This isn't Meredith and Derek's date. I thought that we need to get Derek Shepherd a little better, before we let them go on a date. Yes, we all know Derek Shepherd. However, my Derek is a little bit different than the one on television. So I hope you like this update. Yes, I know that this is a short chapter, but it's still valuable. I hope you enjoy. Please, read and review.**

**Disclaimer: I still don't own Grey's. **

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Derek Shepherd woke up Saturday morning with a large smile on his face, which was unusual for him. For the past couple of months, ever since he had found Addison in bed with Mark, he hadn't been able to sleep and Derek hadn't smiled in quite a while. Well, except for the few moments that Meredith was near him and they were alone, and that was just one day of smiles versus two months of frowning and trying to figure out what he had done.

Derek thought that he had been a good husband. He was always there for his wife: when she was sick, when she wanted to go somewhere, when she wanted to do something, or even when she just wanted to spend the day at their house. He was always there for her, even with his job. So Derek couldn't understand why she had cheated on him.

Derek was hurt, but the part that made him hurt the worst was that he had lost his best friend in the whole mix. Mark was his best friend, his brother. He could go to Mark for anything – they could just talk, just drink, or fish. They just did things together and they were brothers.

Mark slept with his wife, and from what Derek could tell when he walked in on them, he knew that they weren't drunk. So…what other reason would there be? Had they been sleeping with each other for a while now? How was Derek not able to tell if they were? How could he not know that his best friend and his wife were having an affair? Did he do something wrong? Was he not good enough? These were the questions that haunted Derek Shepherd everyday.

Derek sat up more on his bed, shaking the bad memories from his head and looked at the wall in front of him as the smile on his face stayed because he remembered the giggles, the smiles, the green orbs that he wanted to get lost in of Meredith's. It seemed as if Meredith was the only reason, only sane thing in his life right now. He knew it was crazy, because he had just met her yesterday, in a marriage counseling session and then he found out that she lived on the same floor of the same apartment complex building. Was this fate? Or was this just coincidence?

It was probably just coincidence. Derek didn't believe in fate anymore because look at where it got him.

However, somewhere deep inside of him he could tell that he would be hurt by Meredith Grey if she was to leave him or go away or something. He knew that if she was the one that cheated on him with his best friend, he would have been a broken man for the rest of his life. It was crazy, hell he even knew it was crazy but he knew that it was the truth. But then again, Derek knew that she wouldn't cheat on him if they ever got that far into a relationship. He knew that she wasn't that type of person, he could just tell every time he looked into her eyes.

Her eyes revealed her soul to him. If Derek was able to sit and look into her eyes forever, he would do it. They had that connection where they could speak without using words. At least, Derek Shepherd felt that way.

Derek shook his head as he got off of his bed. He couldn't be thinking about how he wanted to get lost in Meredith's eyes when he only knew some little things about her. However, Derek knew from these feelings now and the feelings that he had been feeling since he had walked into her office, seeing her form sitting there – Derek Shepherd was falling for Meredith Grey.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8.**

**I'm sorry that I haven't written an update in a week. I really am. I have been so busy. Over the past week I have had two tests, three papers, I have a test Wednesday and I also have to two more papers written one for tomorrow and another for Wednesday. Then, I have also been busy with Phi Sigma Pi. So…again I am sorry. I am going to try to have two updates written today. I hope to have a update tomorrow from Mark's perspective. I really haven't done that, and I need to do it. But for those of you who want to know whose story this is going to be well….DRUM ROLL PLEASE: this is going to be Meredith and Derek. However, I am going to be writing another story for Meredith and Mark. So for those of you who want a Mer/Mark story. I am going to start working on that soon and it's going to be on . **

**I also wanted to thank you for commenting. I am a comment whore. It's true. But I'm not going to hold this fic hostage because I don't get comments. I tried that once, and I just lost readers. Haha. **

**So if you are still with this fic, which I hope you guys are: I love you! Mwah. **

Meredith had been sitting here all day. Well not all day, but most of it. When she wasn't on the phone with Cristina or Mark, she had been sitting on her bed looking at her closet. She didn't know what to wear. Last night, she tried to decide what she wanted to wear on her date with Derek. Should she wear something comfortable? Should she wear something fancy? She had everything imaginable, but she still couldn't decide what to wear.

Meredith looked down at her phone. She had received a phone call from Derek about three hours before now. He had told her that he would come over to her room at about eight thirty. He told her that it was the "prime time" to go out and have a small dinner before he showed her the world more amazing than the one now". She laughed and told him that he sounded weird. He laughed and told her that he would see her later. They both reluctantly hung up the phone

That was at 3:30 and now it was six-thirty, Meredith noticed as she looked down at her phone. So she really needed to pick out an outfit now, before she ran out of time. Meredith didn't take very long showers, and it really didn't take her that long to get ready, mainly about 50 minutes: that included 15-20 minutes for her shower and then doing her putting her clothes on, doing her hair and make up nicely with took up the rest of the time. So, she wasn't worried about that. Her main problem was choosing something to wear. Something nice. Something Derek approved. Something that made Derek happy and made him want to go out on another date with him. Meredith knew it wasn't the outfit that made someone choose to go out with a person again, it was their personality. However, it didn't hurt to look nice, especially for Derek.

Meredith looked down at her cellphone one more time and decided that she needed to decide what she was going to wear now. If she didn't, she probably would end up being late. She stood up off her bed and then went over to her closet and decided against something casual, and she also decided to go against something formal. They were going for dinner and they weren't just going to a movie, they were going to "see worlds more amazing than their own". So she decided on wearing a dress. She didn't want to go with something that most people went on dates with: the little black dress. She had plenty of those and she looked good in all of them. However, she decided to wear her new dress, she had just bought this dress.

Her new dress was a black spaghetti strapped dress. It was a little shorter than her knees and it had white, pink, and blue colored flowers printed all over it. It was soft and flowy. It showed off her curves in a respectable manner, yet gave the right amount of cleavage. Her breasts weren't popping out, not were they hidden from the world. Meredith was proud of her body and she was going to show it off. Meredith grabbed the Nordstrom bag from her closet and placed it on her bed.

She stripped herself of clothing as she headed for the bathroom, leaving a trail of clothes on her way to the bathroom door.

She started her shower and then got in, letting the hot shower rain hit her skin. Meredith loved showers because they reminded her of the rain. She loved sitting out in the rain, listening to the rain, or just watching the rain. It was nature's way to calm her down. She really didn't have too many moments were she was upset, but there were her days. Showers used to be the only things that she could rely on. However, now she had Mark and Cristina. Meredith, also, knew that she could rely on Derek. He seemed like the perfect guy to rely on. However, she wasn't going to start relying on him just yet. She barely knew him. Meredith had known Mark and Cristina for years, but Derek just seemed different. Maybe he was the type of guy that you could fall in love with at first site.

She wrapped a towel around her as she got out of the shower. She had spent less than 15 minutes in the shower, and she didn't have to worry about being late. So she smiled as she walked over to the mirror and looked at herself. She looked refreshed and happy. All of her thoughts were on Derek, and Meredith wondered if this is why she was like this. She should be nervous. First date ever and she should be nervous, however she was just happy and smiley. She couldn't wait to see Derek.

Meredith walked over to her closet. She had the dress, now she had to pick the shoes. She went to the back of her walk-in closet and looked at her shoe collection. Meredith really wasn't a shoe girl, but every time she went to the store she happened to pick up another pair of shoes. All of her friends laughed at her, because she had piles and piles of shoes.

She wanted to wear a black pair of shoes, with a little heel and she knew the perfect ones. They were t-strapped black shoes. They were her favorite going out shoes, but she wasn't able to wear them that often. She picked them from the top shelf and took them to her bedroom with her.

Meredith went back to the bathroom, doing her hair in natural waves and her make up with natural browns and pinks. She smiled at herself and then went back to her bed. She put a pair of black lacey panties on along with her dress and shoes. She didn't put hose on because she liked her legs, and she was afraid that hose would cover it up. And she really didn't like hose that much anyway.

Meredith looked at the time and realized that she took a little bit more time than she usually does. It was now eight fifteen and she walked into her living room. She had fifteen more minutes until Derek was supposed to pick her up and that was when she started to get nervous. The butterflies were flying all around her stomach. Her hands were a little shaky, and she started to panic.

What if Derek didn't like what he found? What if Derek only wanted her for sex? What if she really was just a rebound? What if he made back up with his wife? What if this? What if that? So many questions were going through her head and she was pacing all around her apartment.

She went into the kitchen to calm herself down and she got a cup of water. She slowly downed the water, hoping to not make the butterflies move faster. She got up after she finished her drink and that was when she heard the knocking on the door.

She started at a jog, but then slowed down. First, it wasn't a good idea to run in heels and second, it wasn't a good idea to run. Period.

She placed her hand on the door knob and then slowly opened the door. When she opened the door she was met with the beautiful blue eyes that had been burned into her memory. However, they were much better in person.

Derek stared back at her and smiled the smile that he had on his face everything he was around.

"Hi." He said softly. When she didn't answer quickly, he tilted his head to the side and smiled once more before saying her name. "Meredith?"

He watched as Meredith shook her head and smiled back at him. Derek hoped to see Meredith smile all the time when he was around her, which he wished was for a very long time. He knew that it was crazy, but honestly: he didn't care how much of an idiot he sounded like. Sometimes the truth sounds like idiocy, but it is the truth none-the-less.

"Hi Derek." She smiled back at him, shifting her wait from one foot to the other, to sharing the weight on both. Derek looked down to her feet and that was when he realized what she was wearing, and if her eyes already didn't take his breath away; her beauty did.

"You are gorgeous." Derek breathed, and watched as the soft pink blush covered her cheeks.

"Thank you. You look good too." She said commenting his red shirt and black pant outfit.

"I'd hope so…this is my good looking outfit." He teased her, giving her a small wink.

She turned and then smiled at him. "I need to get my purse. Be right back."

"I don't think you need your purse."

"Why? I think I do." She laughed as she walked over to her couch and then back over to him.

"You aren't paying for anything tonight, so you don't need your wallet if you think that is the case." He stepped into her apartment.

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked. She was new to this, and he didn't know that.

"Yeah."

"Okay."

"Well, I am still taking my wallet."

"Okay, your choice I guess." Derek laughed.

"Okay then." She smiled and then grabbed her keys and walked out the door, Derek taking steps back as she did so.

"So, how are you today Meredith?" Derek asked, looking at her outfit once more before meeting her beautiful green eyes.

"It's going pretty good. And yours?"

"It's amazing now." He smiled at her and held out his arm. She looked down at it and then back up at him, with a quizzical look on her face and then smiled. She could do this. She looped her arm through his as they walked to the elevator.

Meredith was going to tell him that what he told her was corny, but she had learned to expect that from Derek. It was just something she did and Meredith could get used to it.

_Damnit Meredith…you can't be thinking about the future on your first date. Are you crazy?_ Meredith thought to herself as they waited for the elevator.

Meredith and Derek talked about their days while they waited for the elevator and then getting to their car. They talked about how they were and what they loved. They got to know each other. They both got into the car and drove to the restaurant with smiles on their faces. The radio was on, but they really weren't paying attention to it. Meredith was happy with how everything was going and Derek was wondering how he got so lucky.

They arrived at the restaurant and the first thing that Meredith noticed was that it was the place that Mark and her always went to together. It was the place that they met. She looked over to Derek, smiling softly.

"I hope you like this place…my old friend recommended it to me." Derek said and Meredith just nodded.

"I do love this place. My best friend and I go here for breakfast." Meredith said, undoing her seatbelt.

Little did they know that they were talking about the same person. They got out of the car and walked to the entrance, arm and arm. Not hand and hand. Meredith smiled when she noticed Casey was working tonight.

"Hey Casey." Derek looked at Meredith and laughed. "How often do you come to this place?" He joked.

"Oh often." She joked back.

Casey was surprised to see Meredith with a man that she had never seen before. She looked between Meredith and the stranger a few times, wondering what was going on. However, she put a smile on her face and grabbed two menus then walking over to them.

"Hey Meredith…where's McSteamy?" Casey asked, smiling at the both of them then motioning for them to follow her.

"Oh he's at his house I think." Meredith looked over to Derek and laughed at the expression on his face. He looked jealous. He was a cute jealous man.

"Derek…McSteamy is the name that Casey here came up for my best friend." She smiled even more when Derek's smiled down at her, the jealousy gone.

"I better be getting a nickname."

"Why?"

"Because I need a nickname better than Mcsteamy."

"Why do you want a nickname?" Meredith questioned as Casey left them at their table with their menus and drink orders.

"Because I plan on being around. I know that might be scary, but I'm scared too. However I know I want to be around for a while." Derek said confidently and Meredith just smiled back at him. She wasn't the only one getting these feelings and thinking about a future, even if they did meet only a few days ago.

They ate dinner and talked quietly amongst each other. They were both happy and excited for the next part of their date. Neither one brought up the topic of McSteamy again that night. Even if they didn't know the magnitude of McSteamy's real name. Her best friend and his ex-best friend.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9.**

**Thanks for all your patience and your comments. I'm sorry it has been taking me so long to write an update these past few weeks. Like my A/N's have said: I have been super busy. It's been fun though. I have also started my new Meredith and Mark fic, it's called Narrow Stairs and it's on if you want to read it. If you could read it and comment it I would be grateful. Also, now that I have a new fic out I will not be dropping this fic. I will try to have updates when I can for both of the stories. I'm sorry if the updates don't come quick enough.**

**Away from my life and on to Derek and Meredith's: this is going to be Meredith and Derek. It was hard decision. And although, it is going to be Meredith and Derek there will still be Meredith and Mark moments, because Mark is in love with Meredith and they are best friends and Meredith isn't going to avoid Mark just because she is starting to date Derek. Please don't think that, or you will sadly be disappointed. There will be a date between Mark and Meredith. He deserves his one. I personally think Mark is a great guy on Grey's Anatomy. Yes, he is a manwhore but really…how many guys do you know that haven't been around more than few times? In my opinion, a lot of guys are manwhores. Just saying. **

**Okay, so I have rambled enough and I should give you this update. I know that in the last update, Derek said he was planning on being around and I know that it seemed kind of forward, and honestly I don't know why Derek said that. The characters are living in my head, I am just writing their love story. Hope everyone has a good weekend. Always Love. Mwah.**

Derek and Meredith finished their meal in after their conversations about their day and what they wanted to share with each other. It was the first date and both of them knew you weren't supposed to give your life story so they put that off for another time. Actually, Meredith really was thinking that if she told him her life story he would run. He would run so far away that he wouldn't know where he was and Meredith liked Derek so she didn't want him to run away from her. They had left the restaurant and were headed towards their next destination, which Meredith knew very little about.

All Meredith knew was that he was taking her somewhere and he was extremely excited. She was a little nervous, seeing as she didn't know Derek that well and he could be taking her to a secluded park where very little people went or knew them and he could steal her away. Although, she knew Derek wasn't like that. Meredith let a small giggle leave her mouth as she thought that she might not mind Derek stealing her away. He was a great guy. She liked talking to him, which was strange because she only really talked to Mark and Cristina. However, Derek made her want to talk about her life and how good it was. He told her about his life, so it was only fair that she talked about hers.

Meredith watched Derek as he turned off the freeway and onto another street. Meredith knew which part of the city they were on, but other than that she didn't know anything about where he was taking her.

Meredith needed to take a breath. She trusted Derek, as weird as that sounded. She knew him, at least that's what she felt like every time she looked into his piercing blue eyes. When she looked into his eyes she felt at ease and like anything was possible. Meredith felt happy and wanted to just get lost with him. Not in the literal since of the word lost, because if they were lost she would be freaking out, and Meredith grey didn't like to freak out. She did enough throughout her life that she didn't want to freak out again. What Meredith meant by getting lost was she wanted to just be with him, alone. Which sounded weird and nothing like Meredith, but they were the thoughts going through Meredith's mind.

They turned down another street and this road seemed to be less active as the other roads they were on tonight. Meredith noticed a few colonial style houses, which was weird because they weren't in colonial America, and Meredith didn't know what colonial style house looked like, but she guessed that it looked like the ones that were on this road.

Meredith turned to Derek and smiled at him. Even though she couldn't see his face very well because he was concentrating on the road she could tell that he was smiling and that his eyes were shining. Meredith could tell that Derek was excited. She wanted to know where they were going, but she didn't want to interrupt his excited attitude. So, she turned back and looked out the window, not seeing as many houses as she did when they first went on the road. The trees were becoming a forest and she could tell that the road ahead was becoming gravel. Once, again Meredith looked over at Derek.

Although, Meredith didn't want to interrupt his happy moment she really needed to know where they were going, because the road was about to become crumbled rock and she really didn't know where they were going. She really needed a clue.

"Um…Derek." She said, putting a small smile on her face. Meredith waited, and watched Derek turn back to her with a large smile on his face.

"Meredith…stop worrying. I'm not going to hurt you in anyway. This is a surprise and I'm not going to tell you were we are going. Plus, you will know in a few more miles." Derek rolled his eyes at Meredith playfully. She had been asking most of the time on the way to where he was taking her. Derek could tell that Meredith hated surprises, but surprises made it that much more fun.

"Please. I beg you to tell me, because the road just became gravel and you know…it's kind of freaky. We are in the middle of nowhere…"

"We are not in the middle of nowhere." Derek interrupted.

"We kinda are Derek."

"No…you really need to stop worrying." Derek said again.

"But the few trees just became a forest and it just became dark and you aren't telling me where we are going, so what if we get lost?" Meredith said, turning her body towards him.

"One: It's a surprise. And two: I know where we are going, I have been here a few times so we won't get lost and if we do, I have great cellphone reception." Derek laughed and kept driving.

"Derek…this is mean."

"You need to learn to take surprises."

"I don't like surprise."

"I have noticed that." Derek let out a small laugh.

"Please tell me."

"No."

"Please."

"No. I'm not going to tell you. You should know where we are going to be in a few…" Derek stopped and his smile only grew more. Meredith looked out of the window and saw a large telescope coming out of a building. Meredith smile grew also, and then she turned back to Derek.

"Derek…you're taking me to an star observatory?"

"Yep."

"I think I like this surprise."

"I knew you would."

Meredith looked back at him and laughed. "You are an ass."

"No I'm not."

"You kinda are." She laughed and he turned away and then back to her.

"You shouldn't be calling me an ass." Derek smirked.

"Why not?"

"Because…you love my ass. I have seen you staring at it all night."

Meredith laughed and then shook her head. "First of all I haven't been staring at your ass all night…" Derek started laughing. "I mean at all tonight. And just because I might like how your ass looks does not mean that I can't call you an ass. An ass and a butt are two different things. An ass is annoying and well your butt is cute."

Derek started laughing more at how confident Meredith was about telling him that his butt was cute. Most women didn't tell him that until the later dates if there were later dates, and if they did they were usually whores. However, he knew that Meredith wasn't a whore, she was just confident. She wasn't scared and she would say what she wanted to say. That was just another thing that he liked about her.

"So…my ass is cute." Derek smirked.

"No I said your butt was a little cute."

"No my ass is sexy."

"No…it's stupid." Meredith laughed and got out of the car.

This seemed a little weird, Meredith speaking her mind to a guy that she didn't know very well. However, she felt like she knew him well. He made her laugh and made her smile. He made her feel happy. Not that she wasn't happy before, but she felt happy and safe around him. It was a weird kind of feeling, but Meredith guessed that it was a feeling most people got when they met somebody they liked. Meredith knew that he probably didn't like her as much as she liked him, but that was because he had a marriage he knew what love was like. Meredith knew that even though Derek and Addison were divorcing, they still shared that love when they first met each other. So, Derek wouldn't love her or feel the feelings that she was feeling for him for a while, if there was a while.

Meredith knew that there might be a while because he had said that he had planned on being around. Yeah, that statement at first kind of scared her but it made her feel good at the same time. He wanted to be around. He wasn't using her for a rebound. He smiled around her and when they talked they talked about them, not other people. They talked about themselves, and it was okay. It was okay because that's what people did to get to know each other. They talked about themselves, and then after sometime of talking about themselves, they talked about each other. They helped each other out. Meredith had watched enough romantic movies and had done her job enough to know that, that was how love worked. Meredith knew that she wasn't in love with Derek yet, but she knew that it was a possibility. It was a possibility that Meredith could fall in love with Derek Shepherd easily, because he was easy and fun to talk to. He made her feel safe. He told her that she was beautiful and she knew that she could believe him. Meredith would probably fall in love with him with time. And if she would tell herself the truth she would know that she already did kind of love him. He was just the type of guy you fell for, even if you didn't want to even if you weren't expecting it, even if he was just not getting out of a failed relationship.

Meredith knew that it was wrong for her to be dating her patient, but most things that were supposed to happen weren't right. Life was about taking chances and finding the love of your life. In life you aren't supposed to be alone. You are supposed to be happy. Meredith may have had a horrible example of love in her life, but she knew that it was out there. Because even though her mother may have not loved her father, she had loved another man. She had loved a man so much that it had hurt her until they were together. Meredith didn't want the pain of love, but Meredith knew that love came with pain. Pain was a love. Love and pain went hand in hand.

Meredith wanted that love, and she knew that she could find it in Derek, because as they looked out the telescope he kept his hand on the small of her back and when she told him things, he listened. When he looked at her, he smiled and she smiled. They were happy. He took her to a place that he knew that she would like. They were happy and by the end of the night Meredith had been holding his hand and when he led her up to her door, the kiss that she had been thinking about had come.

Meredith had felt the kiss on her lips, but the tingling sensations from it all had traveled throughout her body. It went from her brain to her toes, her body shivered but only because of the rush she had got from the kiss she shared with Derek. She hadn't minded when he pushed his body up against hers and kissed her a second and third time. She had enjoyed it. She enjoyed the feeling of Derek's lips against hers. They reluctantly pulled away from their shared kiss and then said goodnight.

Meredith had watched Derek walk to his door and then she opened his smiling at him one last time before she entered her room and touched her lips as her back, gently hit the back of the door.

Meredith's first date wasn't awkward, it was great. Although it was too early to know, Meredith knew that this was the beginning of their love story.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10. **

**Okay, so I am so completely and entirely sorry. I know that I shouldn't have started this fic when I did, because I knew I was going to be busy. I just didn't realize how busy I was going to be. And now that I read over what I just said, that doesn't mean that I am going to stop this fic. I am going to finish it. I will. It might take me a little longer than I expected, but I do expect to finish it. **

**Thank you for the reviews. I love them, as always. **

**I am going to have three or four updates this week. I'm on spring break and I'm at home, feeling like crap. So I should have updates. I hope you like where this story is going. If you don't…well let me know. **

**On to the story:**

**DISCLAIMER: I still don't own Grey's Anatomy. Sadly, I don't even own season four dvd set. How depressing. **

**- - - - - - - - - **

It was Monday morning and Meredith was still feeling the effects of her date that Saturday night. Her lips still tingled, her body felt warm and fuzzy all over. It was ridiculous, this Meredith knew for sure. Meredith was headed out the door and walking for the elevator when she heard the voice of the man that made her feel the way that she did right now. Meredith closed her door and then turned to the voice, looking down the hall at his apartment door.

"Hey Derek," she said smiling at him. She was pretty sure that all the smiling she had done that weekend was about to hurt her, pretty badly. However, she really really did not care. She was happy. Meredith Grey hadn't been this happy for a while, even with her best friend which made her feel bad, but her happiness overcame her sorrowful feelings.

"Her Meredith. How was your weekend?" He asked casually while he walked up to her, the same smile on his face.

"It was pretty amazing…"

"Oh?" He smirked at her, the smirk that made her weak in the knees. The smirk that made him look like he knew everything. Meredith rolled her eyes playfully at him.

"Yep."

"And why was that?" He laughed as she rolled her eyes.

"Well I got caught up on some of my patients. I spent the night talking to my best friend last night. Let's see…what else?" Meredith pondered as she walked over to the elevator. She wasn't about to tell him that one of the main reasons her weekend was so great was because of the date. No, she wasn't about to do that. He would never get over it. "I also got to sleep in, it was amazing." She laughed as she pressed the down button for the elevator.

Meredith turned around and was face to face with Dr. Derek Shepherd.

"What else?"

"Nothing else." She smiled innocently, trying not to faint because of how close he was. No man had ever gotten this close to her, except Mark.

"I think you are lying." He said, pulling back and stepping away from her.

"Nah…I don't think I am." She said, as the elevator doors opened.

The two of them walked inside and stood in the middle of the empty elevator.

"I think you are."

"I'm not…how was your weekend?" Meredith asked Derek.

"It was amazing."

"And why is that?"

"The same as yours."

"Oh…got caught up on patients, spend the night talking to my friend last night."

"Liar." Meredith laughed.

"I am not."

"Yes you are."

"Then so are you."

"Your ego is so huge."

"Not the only thing." Derek laughed and turned his whole body towards Meredith.

"Derek…"

"Yes Meredith."

"I loved our date. Which I know I'm not supposed to say but I'm going to say it anyway, because it was really amazing. I mean…really amazing." Meredith semi-rambled at Derek as Derek moved closer to her. His scent surrounding her.

"I loved our date too, Mer. I love just spending time with you."

"I like spending time with you too."

"You love it."

"You are so cocky."

"Maybe…are you complaining about it?" Derek laughed, as he watched Meredith's eyes closing and she leaned towards him.

"Maybe." She said softly pressing her lips against his. His lips gently met hers, in much the same way as they did that Saturday night that they had spent together. Looking up at the starts, and just talking. This kiss was just as good, if not better. Meredith's small hands went through Derek's hair pulling gently at his dark curls.

They pulled back reluctantly.

"Complaining now?" Derek asked her.

"Definitely not."

"Good." Derek placed another gentle kiss against her lips.

"You're not complaining are you?"

"Definitely not." Derek repeated.

"Good." Meredith smiled at him.

**I know…short update. However, I will hopefully have longer ones over the course of this week. Have a great rest of the Sunday. Mwah. Always Love.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 – Same As You.**

**Okay, so I have decided on something. I am no longer going to tell you that I will have an update on a certain day, because it seems that I am not able to keep that promise. I get overwhelmed with everything: homework, friends, college, family, and sickness. All of these things keep me from updating like I would like to, and I am so sorry for that. It disappoints me when I don't do something that I tell someone that I will do. It's aggravating, and I bet that's not just for me. So…I'm not going to give daily plans anymore and I'm not going to tell you when I can have another update. The best thing that I can try to do is to try regular updates. **

**If you are still reading this, thank you for sticking with me. However, if you no longer read this…I still thank you for reading when you did. **

**So on to the update. Please leave reviews and comments, I absolutely love them.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Grey's Anatomy, Patrick Dempsey, or Eric Dane – but by god, the things I could do with those three things. Mmmm. HBO here we come. Haha.**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - **

Mark couldn't believe what was happening before him. He hadn't thought it would ever happen, but here he was listening.

The man that swore to hate him for the rest of his life was here talking to him about some girl that he had went on a date with Saturday night. Mark really wasn't picking up any details because Derek told him that he would never talk to him again, and it had only been a few months since the incident.

However, Mark tried to look like he was listening, which he knew wasn't the best thing because if he wanted to be best friends or even friends again with Derek he should probably be listening, really listening. Mark shook his head and looked at Derek once more.

"She was absolutely wonderful. She is smart and funny, everything that Addison wasn't. She is absolutely beautiful, and not in that way where she wears too much make-up or her clothes are top of the line. She is just absolutely beautiful, especially in casual clothes. Absolutely stunning." Derek said, looking at Mark.

Mark smiled at Derek, but was really at a loss of words. What were you suppose to say to your ex-best friend who just got divorced because of you, then he just went on a date with an "absolutely stunning" woman? Sometimes, Mark wished that there were handbooks on these kind of issues.

"I'm glad, dude." Mark replied, leaning against the nurse's station and looking at Derek.

"Yeah." Derek replied, opening his chart. Derek turned away from Mark without saying goodbye and walked away. Mark shook his head and walked after him.

"Derek."

"Yes, Mark?"

"Why did you tell me about your date?"

"Because…" Derek turned around to Mark and just looked at him. Honestly, Derek didn't know why he told Mark, he just knew that he needed to tell someone to make the night that much more real.

"Derek?"

"I don't know…I just needed to tell someone."

"So we aren't friends again?" Mark said walking in step with Derek as they headed for their offices.

"No." Derek said bluntly.

"Dude…but I led you to this wonderful girl." Mark smirked

"No, you really didn't." Derek said, stopping at his door. "I did this one on my own."

"Yeah, but if I didn't…" Mark didn't dare finish his sentence, because he could tell that even though Derek had met a girl he wasn't over what Mark and Addison did to him.

"I'm glad you stopped what you were about to say."

"Yeah…me too." Mark replied, walking over to his office.

"Bye Derek."

"Bye Mark."

Mark walked inside of his office, thinking about everything that was going on in his life. He couldn't believe that he had slept with his best friends wife. What kind of idiot did that? What kind of idiot risked one of his best friendships? He knew who would. Someone that was in love with Meredith Grey, but Meredith Grey wouldn't give him more than a friendship. That was the kind of idiot that would ruin great things, because he couldn't ruin his chance with Meredith. However, he knew that if his Meredith was to find out what he did they would never talk again. Meredith hated cheaters, she was a wonderful woman that gave people second chances but she could never forgive a cheater – even if the cheater didn't cheat o her.

His Meredith was the most loving person that he had ever met.

He was lucky that Meredith was in his life. He didn't know what he would do if she wasn't in his life. If he dared himself to think about the possibility of Meredith not being in his life, his life would sum up to a bunch of nothing, meaningless one night stands and nothing else. He probably wouldn't be where he was without his best friend. Yes, he had a few other friends beside Meredith, but none of those made him feel like he was supposed to accomplish something in his life.

Meredith had made him fight for the things that he wanted in his life.

Meredith made him stand up to his parents.

Meredith made him wake up in the morning.

Meredith made him live. Which sounded extremely cheesy and corny but he knew that it was the truth. His life would be hell without Meredith Grey.

Mark couldn't believe that he had a date with her that Friday night. He still needed to make plans, and make him fall in love with him. Mark wasn't the type of guy to think about forevers or kids, but he could imagine these things with Meredith. He wanted to be with Meredith forever. He wanted to have matching rocking chairs. He wanted to have grandchildren running around the big oak tree in the front yard, but only with Meredith. He wanted to have the wonderful lifetime that Derek always talked about. Mark wanted the whole package, but he would only take it with Meredith.

Mark thought that he would share Meredith's first date with her. However, he wasn't the man that was the lucky one. Mark wanted to be the one that she shared all of her firsts with, but it seemed another man had taken his place. He needed to know more about this man. He needed to know what he was like. Was he a nice guy? Did he have one night stands? Did he worship the ground that Meredith walked on? Did he kiss his Meredith, Saturday night?

Saturday night was pure hell for Mark, because he could only think about what was happening. He thought about the worst things, but quickly realized that Meredith wouldn't sleep with the man on her first date. No, she wasn't that type of woman. If she hadn't dated a guy before, then she wouldn't sleep with him that easily. She was looking for forever, she knew what she deserved. Meredith believed that when someone had sex it was supposed to mean something, mean something so great. So she wouldn't do that on the first date.

Mark just hoped that he would be able to share forever with his Meredith, he wanted to be the one to kiss her first, hold her hands on the beach (as a couple), he wanted to share his whole heart and soul with Meredith – because he loved her that much. No woman had ever made him feel like this, except her. She made him feel like life was worth living. That even if he made mistakes, it was okay. Mark just hoped that she wouldn't have to find out that he cheated, that he made the most inexcusable mistake of all time, because he really didn't know what he would do if that was to happen.

He couldn't imagine a life without Meredith.


	12. Chapter 12

Meredith couldn't believe that she had a date with Derek Shepherd again this Sunday. He told her something about it being important that he showed her this now before she regretted being with him. Meredith wasn't sure what she was going to do. What was he going to show her? How he told her to get ready, was not the best way to be happy about their next date. However, Meredith was excited. It showed in everything she did. She smiled even more than she did before. She was more cheerful around her patients, even in the early stages of their counseling. She was just happy. So happy to have a date with him.

However, another part of her was freaking out. What if what he was about to show her dealt with his ex wife? What if he wanted to get back together with Addison? What if Derek had another wife or girlfriend? What if he was really gay? Meredith laughed at her last suggestion. Derek wasn't gay. Yeah, he did his hair and looked nice all the time. However, he wasn't gay. Now he may be every gay man's dream, but he wasn't the gay one. Meredith let out a breath of air, that she held as the idea went through her head.

Meredith sat at her desk and began thinking of other suggestions that might be the plan for Derek's night. There were so many bad ideas; however there were also great ones. Great ones that dealt with just them, being together and being happy unlike him and his ex….

Oh shit. Meredith couldn't do this. No, because she wouldn't be giving Derek and Addison the chance that they truly deserved. Meredith had to break it off with Derek right this instance. Derek and Addison were just having a few problems. They would get over it. They had to, they looked like the perfect couple. They were both gorgeous. Derek couldn't want her when he had had Addison. No, that would be stupid of him to do that.

Meredith was a plain girl. She didn't have anything special about her. Yes she was thin, but Addison was too. Addison had stunning red hair without split ends – while Meredith had un-unique blonde hair with split ends. Addison regularly probably regularly wore heels that showed off her "perfect legs". She probably gave the best sex. Meredith didn't know. She never had been with a guy before. Why would Derek Shepherd want a virgin? He would probably laugh when he found out and tell her to get out of his life.

Meredith shook her head. No she couldn't think that, because Derek wouldn't do that. Derek was a great guy, something like being a virgin wouldn't bother him. Maybe it would make him want her more. Meredith shook her head more, then placed her elbows on the desk placing her head in her hands. Meredith didn't care if being this way made him want her more. He wasn't going to find out because Addison and Derek had to fight for their relationship.

Meredith looked at the black phone on her desk and it looked threatening to her. She had to call Derek and tell them that they couldn't do this. No, they couldn't do this because she was a marriage counselor not a homewrecker.

Meredith's right arm reached for the door, and she was about to dial his number when the phone started ringing. Meredith looked at the phone because it shocked her. She didn't know whether to pick up the phone or not. What if it was Addison telling her that she wanted another appointment soon? What was Meredith going to do? But Meredith picked up the phone even if it was Addison.

"Hello, Meredith Grey." She said in her best professional voice that she could muster at the moment.

"Hey Mer." Meredith let out a soft breath.

"Hey." She said softly, relaxing in his voice.

"I just wanted to call you and say hey." Derek laughed, and Meredith's melodic giggle followed.

"Hey."

"What are you doing?" Derek asked.

"I'm sitting here, thinking." Meredith couldn't lie to him no matter how tempting it was. However, she wasn't going to tell him what she was thinking about. No, she should shave that for another time. Maybe later this evening when she went home, because she didn't have work tomorrow – so she could cry tonight and not worry about having to look like crap tomorrow. How pathetic did that sound? She had gone on one date with him and now she was thinking about crying after having to tell him that they couldn't do this anymore.

"Thinking about what?" Derek asked her, in a soft voice. Meredith swore there were sometimes that she wished that she could be more strong willed, because the way he talked to her was mesmerizing. It was amazing how he could say one word and his voice displayed so many emotions, just like his eyes. His eyes were the most stunning blue she had ever seen. If they were to make clothes out of the color of his eyes, she would buy it. Shoes included.

Apparently, Meredith had been thinking too much about his characteristics that Derek was yelling in the phone trying to get her attention.

"Sorry…what?" She asked, forgetting his original question.

"What are you thinking about Mer? You don't sound too happy." Derek said, trying to make her talk to him.

"Just thinking about some of my clients."

"You want to talk about it?" He asked her again. Damn him and his sweet voice that made her want to talk to him. However, she couldn't talk to him – his wife and him were the problem.

"No…I'll…"

"Meredith you can talk to me you know that right?"

"Yeah I do." _But I don't think I should. You are the problem. You and your stupidly perfect wife._ Meredith muttered in her mind.

"Good."

"Okay."

"Meredith talk…or I will be coming over there because you don't sound happy at all."

"I'll be fine, it's just a little stressful."

"Are you sure?" Derek said, and Meredith wished that it was for the last time.

"Yeah."

"Okay, I'll talk to you a little later tonight then?" Meredith could hear his smile over the phone.

"Yeah…you will." Meredith didn't want to talk to him, but she had to. She couldn't carry on this relationship or whatever it was just because she thinks she found the one. No, that's not right. Stupid…stupid Addison.

"Okay Mer. I'll see you later. I hope everything gets better."

"Thanks…you too." Meredith hung up the phone before Derek could answer. Meredith wanted to cry which was absolutely ridiculous. She couldn't cry over a man she had just met. Even if he was amazing and great and perfect, no she couldn't cry over him. Stupid Derek and his wife. After tonight she would probably never see him again because she couldn't counsel them anymore. No, that would be hell for her and it wouldn't be right to them.

Meredith put her head back in her hands and she felt the tears releasing them from her eyes. Derek had ruined her. Before him, she had never met a guy that made her smile like he did. Yes, Mark made her smile and laugh but he didn't make her smile like Derek did. Derek was absolute perfection. His eyes, his lips, his smile, his everything it was perfect. The way he held her hand, the way he smiled at her, the way his eyes changed color depending on his mood. She was going to miss it. Once Derek realized that Addison was the love of his life and she was just a rebound, he would be happy again she was never going to see him again. This was hell. Pure hell.

Meredith wondered what she had done to deserve this.


End file.
